Way of the Gym
by The Legendary Olympians
Summary: School sucks, the subjects suck, the learning material sucks. But wait! There's gym! Actually no, the jerseys suck too. One-shot. Complete.


**Title: Way of the Gym**

**Summary: School sucks, the subjects suck, the learning material sucks. But wait! There's gym! Actually no, the jerseys suck too. One-shot. Complete.**

**Word Count: 1754**

**Nike: Okay, this is gonna be kinda stupid. Started 5 months ago. But bear with us, please. **_**Please.**_

**Dargon: DANGIT, I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY WE STARTED IT LIKE A CENTURY AGO! Yes, we started it last year at school. And yes, we somehow came up with this stupid thing. XD Or **_**someone **_**did. I can't remember who, but if it was me, DON'T PULL THE TRIGGER. SERIOUSLY. AND DON'T POINT IT AT MY HEAD EITHER.**

**Nike: Don't mind us. Just read. And hopefully enjoy. And facepalm. A lot…**

**Dargon: Or cringe. Like I did multiple times. (Psssst. There's like a one-in-million chance this will actually turn out good.) I'm taking up a lotta words writing this out, but truthfully, for some reason it's fun typing in this font! I love bold! XD**

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><p>The four heroes were stuck in school. Yes, that's right. School. Like, that big building over there? Yeah, that's it. Wheeeeeeee, close-up zoom on the old, drab, crumbling bricks of - No? Oh, okay. So yeah, the Links were at school. Of course, school is a waste of time, and of COURSE shouldn't be something considered a THING… or, at least, that's what Blue thought. He didn't know if Green or Red thought the same, but he certainly knew Vio thought completely otherwise.<p>

"There's just no USE for it," he complained as they headed down the old, cracked hallways of the old, cracked school amidst the old, cracked tiles as their footsteps receded in the old, cracked air.

"I, for one, find it quite educational… If you don't already know what is being taught." Vio sniffed indignantly.

"Hey! Were you referring to me?!"

"No."

"I… hmm… what's next?" Red asked, his nose buried in their schedule.

"Fifth period," Green and Blue groaned at the same time.

Blue glanced at the schedule Red was holding. "Please tell me it's not En -" Suddenly, his eyes went wide, and he whooped loudly. "YES! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!" He pulled up into fighter position, punching repeatedly at an imaginary foe. "Yeah, time for some REAL training, FOOLS!"

Vio sighed. "Please don't tell me -"

"Gym's next?" Green asked.

"BEAT 'CHA THERE, SUCKERS!" Blue took off in a flash, and was gone in an instant, though they could still hear him screaming, "SURVIVAL FOR THE FITTEEEEEEEEEEST!"

Vio groaned, rubbing his eyes, and Green and Red laughed as they followed after Blue.

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><p>Gym. A wonderful place to exercise, get out to the fresh, outside world, and… pity yourself and your incoordination while Blue watched and laughed. At least, that was Red's Physical Education class in a nutshell.<p>

"C'mon, Red," Blue said as Red almost tripped over the low balance beam.

"I'm sorry!" Red wailed. "I'm not good at balancing!"

"Staying on your feet, you mean?" Blue joked.

"Yeah!"

At that precise moment, Coach Joy from the opposite side of the room blew her whistle. The shrill screech resounded through the air as everyone immediately stopped what they were doing (one student dropped a dumbbell onto another one's foot in his hurry to focus his full attention on the coach) and stood at attention.

"NOW!" The coach yelled (she was one of those mean, old strict teachers who liked to yell). "LISTEN UP, PETUNIAS! YOU'RE IN _MY _GYM NOW! AND WHEN YOU'RE IN MY GYM, YOU PAY ATTENTION TO EVERYTHING I SAY. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. UNDERSTAND?!"

"Aye!" The children all stood straight and snapped a hand into a salute. Save for Vio and Blue.

"YOU! PURPLE QUADRUPLET! INTO POSITION!" Coach Joy screeched, pointing an accusing finger in Vio's direction.

"Harsh much?" Vio muttered, limply bringing a hand into a half-meant movement of respect.

"YOU'RE HOLDING US UP. STRAIGHTEN YOUR BACK."

Vio smiled in coy obedience and stood up straight.

Blue snickered. "Well, Vio, this is new."

Vio wisely decided to ignore.

"AND YOU! HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO TELL YOU? OBEY ME!" Coach Joy shouted, turning her blazing eyes on Blue.

Blue shrugged. "I am the master of my movements. Nothing can change that, be you my coach or not."

_Oh no. Blue's using fancy wording_, Vio thought.

"Blue!" Green half-hissed, half-whispered. "Just do it!"

Everyone abruptly stopped talking as the coach thundered, "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?"

"You can't control me, old hag. Do you need a simpler wording?"

"I WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY FORM OF DISRESPECT TOWARDS ME… SO FIVE EXTRA LAPS WHEN WE GET OUTSIDE! GIVE ME ANY MORE SPUNK AND COUNT ON ME TO DOUBLE IT!"

Blue rolled his eyes as the coach turned away to yell at another student. Red, however, immediately began bouncing up and down worriedly on the balls of his feet.

"Blue, you could have gotten into real trouble," he whispered. "Wouldn't it be just easier to follow what she's saying?"

"Nah," was all Blue said. "More training this way."

"Not if you get sent to the principal's office," Vio said, and everyone else nodded in agreement.

"Well, whatever. I got this covered, so stop worrying about me."

"Who said we were worrying?"

"ALRIGHT, PIPSQUEAKS!" The coach shouted before the conversation continued. "WE'RE GONNA GO OUTSIDE TO THE FIELD FOR SOME PRACTICE! ALL OF YOU, TWO LAPS WARM UP! BLUE BOY, YOU'RE DOING SEVEN! MAKE SURE TO PUT ON A JERSEY BEFORE YOU GO OUT THERE, OR I TAKE EXTRA POINTS OFF IF YOU'RE NOT OUT THERE WITH A PINNIE ON! GOT IT?"

"YES, COACH JOY!" Everyone yelled, and then scrambled for the rack of jerseys right next to the double doors that led outside.

As soon as the four Links reached it, they noticed something off: a terrible odor was surrounding the jerseys, as if no one had bothered to clean them since the beginning of time.

"Whoah!" Green pulled his shirt up to cover his nose. "Are we seriously wearing those?"

"It seems like everyone else is, so…" Vio said.

Everyone painstakingly pulled a jersey over their heads, except for Blue.

"Blue…?" Green asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Rebel, remember?" Blue pointed a thumb at his chest.

"Deal with it." Green rolled his eyes and threw a jersey at Blue's head.

"Awwww." Blue grudgingly put the jersey on.

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><p>It was raining as the Links trotted outside with the rest of the students, everyone's shoes riddled with mud and grass within seconds. It didn't help that they had to do warm up laps as well, seeing how slippery the ground was. After Green, Red, and Vio finished, they ducked underneath the bleachers facing the track for cover while they watched the other students - as well as Blue - continue to jog around the track.<p>

When at last Blue completed his final lap, the coach stood up from where she had been sitting under a completely dry wooden stand with a roof over it and came over. "THAT SHOULD TEACH YOU TO BE INCONSIDERATE. ANYWAYS, THAT WARM UP WAS TO PREPARE YOU FOR MORE RUNNING, SINCE WE'RE DOING OUR TRACK AND FIELD UNIT. NOW, OUR NEXT THING TO DO IS OBVIOUSLY MORE RUNNING. I WANT THOSE LEGS UP AND PUMPING! THIRTEEN LAPS AROUND THE TRACK AND NO CUTTING CORNERS, OR YOU ANSWER TO THE PRINCIPAL!"

As the Links headed back out to the track with the others, Blue sped up to catch up with the others. "Seriously, it's like they never bothered to wash these jerseys since they bought them. The rain's making it even worse."

"Maybe they wait for when the students who're wearing pinnies go outside when it's raining so the rain washes the jerseys for them," Green joked.

"By the way it smells out here, that makes more sense than if aliens come down each century to wash them."

Red shoved them playfully. "Hurry up! I don't wanna be yelled at!"

"YOU FOUR. SPEED UP."

"Too late," Vio muttered. "At the volume she's at, I wouldn't be surprised if it was in caps in written form."

"What…?"

"Never mind."

The rest of the fifth period gym class dragged on, each second literally inching by as the gym coach put them all through a series of workouts to watch them struggle.

_It's weird how many exercises you can cram into fifty minutes_, Green thought as the coach made them, yet again, jog laps around the track. By this time, however, some students had begun to trip or stop in the middle of a training exercise to catch their breaths. One boy tripped and collapsed altogether. He didn't bother getting back up.

The coach sent him to the principal's office to be "punished for having low endurance levels".

By now, though, most of the students would have rather gone to the principal's dry office than jog out here in the drizzling rain.

"This… should be… illegal…" Green panted.

"I kinda… like this though. What if she's training us for… the greater good?" Blue said between breaths.

"Shut up and save your energy," Vio huffed.

"Aw, you're being mean, Vio!" Red cried, trotting behind them.

"I'm only giving rational advice."

"In the most offending way possible, of course," Blue muttered.

"It's not _offending_, it's more like something called '_I'm_ _just saying_'."

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU TO SHUT THOSE CHATTY TRAPS OF YOU FOUR? SHUT IT AND RUN!"

"Sheesh," Green murmured, and they continued on in silence.

As the minutes progressed, though, the coach did start to calm down a bit, miraculously.

Just a bit.

Like, this much?

"ALL RIGHT, STUDENTS, THOSE EXERCISES SHOULD'VE BEEN ENOUGH FOR YOUR LEGS. NOW, DROP DOWN AND GIVE ME TWENTY!"

Well, at least she was calling them "students". And at least there was no more running.

Vio checked the clock on the scoreboard near the bleachers, the numbers mindlessly continuing to tick. _Only a few more minutes until she completely calms down. _

The Links obediently followed the coach's demanding instructions, all of them bent on just making it through the period. When that was finally over, the coach blew her whistle. "Good job today, pipsqueaks! Not saying you aren't a sorry bunch, but still, decent work. Now, I want you all outta here in three minutes! Got it? Three! See you on the next Gym day, and don't get on my nerves!"

"Wow. Did she just say a couple of sentences without using all capitalization?" Vio whispered.

Everyone stared at him. "What is up with you and this imaginary _story with dialogue _we're in?" Green asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nnnnnnever mind."

"Hey, should we ask her…" A devilish grin spread across Blue's face. "Should we ask her about the jerseys?"

"The -" Green quickly caught on. "No. Wait, seriously?" he laughed.

"Really! We wouldn't be offending anyone, and it's just an act of curiosity or whatever, so…"

"Hey, Coach Joy?" Red called.

"Red!" Green hissed, shoving him slightly.

"Three minutes. You all have three minutes. Stop wasting your time." Coach Joy replied, waving her hand in an air of dismissal.

"Um, I—_we_—have a question." Red said.

"Continue."

"Erm…" he glanced at the others.

"When are the jerseys washed?" Blue asked.

"My dear victims—I mean, students—the rain is one huge washing machine. We like to take advantage of that." With that being said, she turned around and entered her office, locking the door behind her.

The four looked at each other, Green breaking the silence. "Told ya so."

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><p><strong>Thoughts on the stupidity? :)<strong>


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